“iZombie” Recap: XOXO Gossip Girl

Nobody likes a gossip and this week’s victim learned that the hard way through a prank turned deadly on iZombie. Clive and Liv investigate an office murder while Liv puts her newly acquired talents as a snooper to figure out who in the anti-zombie message board was responsible for Wally’s death. Time is running out for Major and it looks like Ravi’s memory serum isn’t having an effect on Blaine. “Wag the Tongue Slowly” was written by Kit Boss and directed by Viet Nguyen. Here’s what happened.

DEADLY PRANKS | When an office gossip is murdered in an apparent office prank gone wrong, Liv (Rose McIver) and Clive (Malcolm Goodwin) investigate all of her coworkers and learn her gossiping ways did not make her very popular. Everyone seems to have an alibi of some sort but the alibis each seem to rely on each other in some way. Through some sleuthing of phone records and the numerous complaints against the victim for her gossiping ways, they discover that they weren’t looking for just one murderer, but a whole team of fed up coworkers. They conspired to spike her yogurt with utopium during a staged fire drill but what they didn’t realize, was that the utopium would react with her current medication in a deadly way. They come clean when Clive and Liv present all the evidence against them including but not limited to, an old porn video, an exclamation point text, and a bad Italian accent.

While they are trying to solve the murder, Clive tasks Liv with going through all the posts on the zombie-hating message board that led to Wally and his family’s deaths. They come across one post leading them to a gun range in the middle of its zombie-killing special and a racist redneck who honest to god says “white power” when he sees how pale Liv is. The racist redneck admits to believing in zombies after his brother showed him a convincing picture. He shows a picture of his now dead brother to Liv and Clive and they realize that he was a lab tech killed in the Max Rager massacre and would actually know that zombies were real and walking around.

DAMSEL IN DISTRESS | Major (Robert Buckley) is determined to find and save Natalie (guest star Brooke Lyons) from the zombie big shot who took her from the Max Rager vault but in order to do that, he needs to be both alive (or the zombie equivalent) and with his memories intact. Unfortunately, the moment is fast approaching where he is going to have to pick one or the other. Ravi (Rahul Kohli) gives him a dose of the cure to hold onto and use when he has no other choice because his inhaler is helping less and less every day. Major recruits Ravi to join him on a stakeout of the guy who took Natalie and when they are caught, Major plants a tracker on one of them while being beaten to the ground. Ravi makes him promise to let this go and not go after him again and Major promises – right before going and doing just that. He follows the tracking information to an apartment building and when he spots Natalie out on a balcony, runs inside and to the door. She is shocked to see him and begs him to leave before he is caught but he wants her to come with. She knows nowhere in Seattle is safe enough for her anymore so he offers her his dose of the cure and tells her it is a full wipe, zombie-ness and memories. She takes it and thanks him and he skedaddles.

MEMORY WATCH | It has been a bit since Blaine (David Anders) has taken the memory serum and still no memories of his past offenses or personality. Peyton (Aly Michalka), much to Ravi’s dismay, invites him to stay at her place so she can keep an eye on him while they wait to see if it has any effect. They grow closer, even having cooking nights together and even though Liv warns Peyton to be careful around him and not lose sight of the big picture, Peyton has only really seen this version of Blaine and so she continues to trust him. Ravi gives it until Saturday before he will conclude the serum has no effect and the night before, Peyton and Blaine come within inches of sleeping together before he pulls away, saying he would hate himself if they did this and then he woke up his old self. The next morning, he wakes up to Peyton standing over him, waiting for the verdict. He is still without his memories and he starts to apologize to her for what that means for her friends but she takes his hand and leads him to her bedroom.

OTHER THOUGHTS:
• Peyton, I don’t care how good of friends you are, how cool he seems, etc. at no point is it not creepy to get in a coffin.
• Line of the Night goes to Liv for, “Also I believe God is a woman so you’re really screwed.”
• The hold on that last piece of brain not quite falling out of the bowl was a nice and relatable touch.

So what did you think? Will Blaine ever get his memories back? Is the racist redneck going to kill more zombies? Was he even the one who killed Wally? How long until Major has to take the cure and lose his memories too? Let us know your theories in the comments below!

iZombie airs Tuesdays at 9pm on The CW.